You’re cosy, comfy and warm. Tucked up in bed with the quilt wrapped around you enveloping you like a lovely warm hug. You may even be dribbling a little (nobody is too graceful to escape this, but nothing can get between you and your peaceful slumber.
In your dream suddenly you hear a tapping noise, this wasn’t the direction you thought the dream was heading in; then suddenly you startle awake and realise that the tapping isn’t from the dream, it’s coming from your bedroom door.
“Can I come in”… A little voice is whispering, while they are not so much tapping now, but almost breaking down your door. *Our door is too stiff for little hands to open, if it wasn’t for this there would be no tapping on the door a full on take over of the bed would already be in force.
My eldest is almost 6 years old and she has been sleeping in her own bed and bedroom for about 4 years now. She stayed in our room and slept in her cot bed until she was about 2 years old. This wasn’t a premeditated decision to have her with us, it just worked out that way. Quite often I would wake in the middle of the night to find that she had managed to stealthily climb into bed and curl up next to me.
I enjoyed the night time cuddles and always thought it was very sweet how she would seek me out in the middle of the night.
However the older she got, the more wriggly she got. Gone were the peaceful and calm hugs with my little angel and in place of her was an octopus who seemed like it was trying to constantly wriggle out of a net.
My good nights sleep seemed to be dwindling.
I thought it might be a difficult transition to getting her to just stay in her own bed and that she may fight me on it, but I needn’t of had any reservations, all I had to do was to pick her up and tuck her back into her own bed with a kiss and a cuddle.
Hooray the war was won!
Cue roughly 3 years later of my daughter sleeping successfully in her own room and own bed and we seem to be taking some steps backwards. Obviously she is older and wiser now, like many 5/6 year olds. They are full of questions and black and white answers that accompany them.
Over the past year she has asked only a handful of times to sleep in our bed, and there have been times where I have allowed her too. Usually if she has complained of feeling frightened of something, but generally I do encourage her to stay in her room, as like I mentioned earlier, over night she grows extra limbs and does her best to make us both aware in the middle of the night that we are not alone in the bed.
Lately though, whenever I say that she should stay in her own room, as she is a big girl she throws this line at me, which I don’t actually to my own satisfaction have an answer that I am satisfied in giving to her.
“Why do I have to sleep on my own, when you and Daddy get to sleep together. It’s not fair that you have each other and I’m alone”
Her 100’s of teddies scattered on the bed are the best defence that she isn’t quite alone though.
That question gets me every time. I of course give her the line that ‘Mum’s and Dad’s have to sleep together because they love each other’. But that of course thrown the question ” But you love me too” from her.
So if anybody has an adequate answer to this question, I’d love the help.